Monday, April 03, 2006

Central Valley Coyotes


The Central Valley Coyotes of the af2 are one of a growing number of professional sports franchises owned by Native American tribes. The Tachi Yokut Tribe of the Lemoore, California area has operated the team out of Selland Arena in Fresno since they left Bakersfield and changed their name from the super lame Blitz to the Coyotes.

The Tachi Yokut's symbol, like many native tribes, is the coyote. Coyote is featured in a very dignified and honorable way in the Tribe's logo, which is featured prominently on the nation's website and at their casino, where Coyote is done in purple neon (very honorable). So why has poor Coyote had his head decapitated in the Central Valley Coyotes logo? At first glance, that is what I see, bloody entrails and all.

Enough about the logo though, I think it is time for another edition of "Meet Your Minor League Football Dance Team"...

Julie
Julie's perfect date "would begin with a shopping spree," so either you need some serious money or you won big on "Supermarket Spree" in the 80's. That would be "followed by dinner at a nice restaurant, and finally a dance show." The next day you could ponder your empty bank account and consider digging your eyes out with a spoon while watching her favorite movie "Steel Magnolias" and her favorite TV shows, "The Real World" and "Laguna Beach".


Cassie
Cassie's role model is Britney Spears "because she is an amazing dancer and performer, and she still has time for a family." And, like Julie, Cassie loves to shop. So enjoy that cash while you can Mr. Federline.


Brooke
Brooke sure loves her music, apparently she likes "everything but blues". Her extensive knowledge of music history is amazing. Her favorite Old Skool artist: Brittney Spears. Favorite Nu Skool artist: Gwen Stefani. And she loves her grandparents listing her grandfather as her all time role model, right up there with Adrianna Lima because "she’s HOTT".


Brittany
Now you can have your cake and eat it too. Brittany describes her perfect date as "anywhere that my boyfriend takes me." And she offers some sagelike wisdom - "Dont frown cause you never know who is falling in love with your smile." Very wise that Brittany.


Brittani
Filling the requisite dance team role as second Britt-ani-any-ney-eny, Brittani is fun: she enjoys sleeping, shopping and eating". Brittani is driven: her role model - "Paris Hilton - she's the best shopper of all time..." And Brittani is modest listing her pefect date as "someone who is just as cute, smart and funny as me. Hey a mirror (j/k)!!!"


Amanda
Finally, Amanda has already had her perfect date in which "M.G. =)" made a committment to her by giving "a promise ring, that shows that he loves and cares for you!! YEAH IT WAS AWESOME" Good, that gives you plenty of time helping her with her hobby of "Rhinestoning Everything because it makes things more PRETTY!!"


God bless you Valley Girls, and all of you Minor League Football Cheerleaders and Dance Teams. You make community college worth attending. Keep up the good work!

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